FIC: Sanguine, a Serpent Knotted Sable (Harry/Lucius, NC-17, non-con, 20,000 words)

[amanuensis1]

Hey, where did darkasphodel go? I want to thank her again for my Smutmas present! Come back and I will give you more smooches. ^_^ There, there's motivation (I hope).

I haven't had any fic announcements here for a couple of months, and that's because everything I've written has been tied up in anonymous fic exchanges. merry_smutmas has had Teh Big Reveal, so, I can share that one with you now.

Sanguine, a Serpent Knotted Sable (direct link to my website is here) was written for fiendling, is Harry/Lucius and NC-17, and one of my longer pieces: just over 20,000 words. There's some kinda intense non-con in this one, including some kinks I've never written before, such as needleplay.

In a few days I will likely post a bit of meta on it: what the title's about, what I was aiming for, how I still lack perspective on its worth and other writerly insecurities. Like you do.

Comments

[florahart]

Hate meme. She changed her name and only friended a few. Ummmm kittenfaced, I think?

[reposoir.livejournal.com]

Also, lilyfaces, too, I believe.

But yeah, looks like she's only friending very, very close people, so...

[sorion.livejournal.com]

Things like that make me really sad. Or angry, depending on my mood...

[silverhielm.livejournal.com]

Now that I know the reason of the lack of fanfics' updates I feel much better.
I'll never be able to express how much your writing means to me and how unreachable your first position is in my personal top 5 of slash authors. This one was different from your previous Harry/Lucius but still excellent (but I think that my comment om MS was explicit enough!)
Thanks for everything, I'll keep waiting for the other revelations *_*
♥♥♥

[amanuensis1.livejournal.com]

I LOVED your comment over on the MS post. It was not only enough, it was enough to keep me warm and toasty in my soul for ages to come! &hearts

[lirren.livejournal.com]

I commented on the original post, but I had to just say something here as well. It's been days since I read this originally and that ending is still haunting me. It's one of those stories that gives you a sudden jolt of shocked adrenaline and then it just tingles for hours. I can only remember four other stories in my entire experience in reading fanfic that have affected me like this one, and none of them in HP fandom. I sort of joke to my sister about you being my dark goddess of HP fanfic, but I think you've definitely earned the title with this one.

[amanuensis1.livejournal.com]

Oh, criminy, that's praise that's too good for me! Really, you are too sweet. But a comment like this will stay with me forever. Thank you so much. *hugs*

[asyndeta.livejournal.com]

(Do you write for a living? If not, why not?)

Okay, so the end of this fic left me screaming. Actually physically screaming and waving my arms like an idiot, and keep in mind that I'm currently at home for Christmas and have woken up my parents. (by the way, 'Other Chambers, Darker Secrets' had the same effect, except it was 3am. My mother's going to start making me go outside with a printed copy if I want to read your fics)

What I really want to say about this fic is actually longer than the story itself, so I'll keep this short: this is the best fic I have ever read, bar none. This will probably need updating the next time you write something equally incredible, but for now, 'tis true. And I read a lot of fic.

Your Lucius is...amazing. He's not the sociopathic rapist portrayed in so many lesser fics; he's intelligent and erudite and a loving father and husband (thank you! One more abusivefather!Lucius fic and I will go out with a bloody shotgun), but at the same time he's cunning and sharply aware of how the Death Eaters work. Which is another thing - your portrayal of the DEs' interaction (in all your fic, but this one in particular) is second to none. The way Lucius forces himself to act around certain people to gain certain reactions is wonderful; the line 'It should not be forgotten: there are no real secrets nails it down perfectly.

And the sex. Ohh the sex. *guh* I started out a while ago hating all forms of non-con, but the sheer art in your depiction of 'forced seduction' (as Lucius puts it) is absolutely irresistable.

Your writing is...indescribable. I shall wait for more from you with baited breath.

P.S: I felt this icon was more fitting now than it usually is. Hah.

[amanuensis1.livejournal.com]

Gawd, how to even reply to this one? That's...wow. Okay, first off, I love the stories about how people get in trouble (waking up family, etc.) because of reactions to fic. That's pure gold. XD And I'm blown away by the superlatives. Just can't even go beyond asdljlsfjaf for those. And while I understand why abusivefather!Lucius gets written and is credible for a lot of readers, it's not something I really want to read, which is why I'm always exploring a different take on that. Okay, I'm back to asdlfja;sldfjal now; can't be coherent any longer. THANK. YOU!!!

[pauraque]

Ooh, meta! Me want, me want! I have such love for that fic.

[amanuensis1.livejournal.com]

It's in outline right now! First I'm trying to be good and answer feedback, hee.

[leni-jess.livejournal.com]

Oh yes, waiting for the meta! I was entranced by this story. it's so intense, but I shall be able to read it again, and enjoy that incredibly rounded and real Lucius.

[amanuensis1.livejournal.com]

Aw, you're too good to me. ^_^

[ariadneelda.livejournal.com]

OMG, I've been dying to squee at you (again) about this incredible story ever since I read it! Seriously, I couldn't believe how awesome it was, maybe the best thing you've ever written. I must admit I didn't realise from the very beginning it was yours but halfway through it I was 99% certain. ^^ What made me doubt at first was the first person POV before I remembered you'd written first person before. Anyway. I'm madly in love with this story. I want to thank you a million times for writing it. I'm so looking forward to hear what you have to say about it. And to the other fic(s)! And I think I'm going to reread it right now. :D

[ariadneelda.livejournal.com]

I did reread it last night! And although I knew the ending this time, once again I found myself breathless and speechless. Completely in awe. There were parts that made me actually shiver; in fact, I was shivering all through the last parts of the story to that killer of a last line. God, I felt like I was in ecstasy or something throughout the whole story. Just like the first time I read it. I'm so, so very impressed by how you wrote Lucius. The most awesome characterisation ever! By the way, that scene with Harry bound on the table reminded me a bit of that L/H pic by Fiendling, 'Wheels of Misfortune'. Did you have that in mind at all, considering she was the recipient? Just curious. :) Anyway. This story is a gift to fandom. There are really no words to express how brilliant it is. I think I adore you even more than I already did, if that is possible!

[viverra-libro.livejournal.com]

I still get excited, thrilled, and sad when I think about this story. I thought it was written by you because the Lucius-voice reminded me of the Lucius/Draco/Fudge piece you wrote around Halloween, and because nobody pervs on lines of little painful things like you do! I shall be eagerly awaiting your meta! (although I hope you won't blame me if I hope very much that your explanation includes your telling us that he didn't really, well, you know. The ending bit. Wrenching! No-one will ever do that particular type of ending as well as you just did)

Many hugs, cookies, beribboned Slytherins, and my eternal adoration.

[amanuensis1.livejournal.com]

Ha, I love that you picked up on the Lucius from the Lucius/Draco/Fudge piece! It's incredibly flattering that anyone would even notice. ^_^ And no matter what the meta says, remember that The Text Is All and what the reader gets out of it is what is important. By all means take what you will from the ending! Thank you so much.

[diagonalist.livejournal.com]

I loved this fic when I read it, and now looking back on it I really should have spotted that it was done by you. It has all of the essential elements that I have come to look for in your fics - non con, but with pleasure, the mental torture and emotional confusion, and most of all the depths of the characters and motivations. No two dimensional people here!

So, yes, a wonderful turn on all around, really.

[amanuensis1.livejournal.com]

*blushes* You really make me grin, you know. Thank you thank you!

[themostepotente.livejournal.com]

You just about killed me ded with the needleplay, dear.

[amanuensis1.livejournal.com]

I couldn't believe I was writing it. If you'd asked me a few years ago I would have said, "Nah, I don't like anything that breaks the skin." But, y'know, for this story, Lucius couldn't play by those rules!

[elfflame]

I adore you and want to have your genious babies. That was so the best fic of the fest (and that's saying a lot, cause there were some great fics). I wish you would write book 7 instead of her. It'd be 100% better. :D

[amanuensis1.livejournal.com]

It'd be 100% DIFFERENT, yeah, but that's all I'll rise to, hee! I am so flattered that you liked the story that much. Even if I don't think I deserve that kinda praise. ^_^

[winningstreak.livejournal.com]

That fic (Sanguine) made me go and read practically everything at your site. Ahahaha I love your writing. You are like, my most favorite fanfic author.
I don't care what my friends call me; the sex is bloody wicked.

[amanuensis1.livejournal.com]

OMG did you really go off and read more of my stuff?? You sweetheart! And yes, too bad for those people who don't get our kinks, bwah ha ha. Thank you SO much for this comment; totally made my day! *hugs*

[adrianabr.livejournal.com]

I still have a long way to go at HP fandom but so far I've read many of your fics, they are all amazing but *this* one... it's under my skin, it made me forget to do everything else but read it and read and read until its end. I couldn't eat, I couldn't drink, I couldn't do anything until I had finished it. And then I read it again. It was a disturbing experience, pleasant and uncomfortable at same time, with an unexpected end (well, unexpected at least for me!). The only other fic that made me behave like that was dargie's "Rough Trade" (an Oz AU with liberal doses of bdsm, just like your story). But it's an unforgettable fic and I'm sure it's already a classic among Potter slash fans - very good job!

[amanuensis1.livejournal.com]

Oh, criminy, I don't even know what to say! *blushes* Thank you so much for this. Wow. That it affected you like that...Seriously, thank you so much for sharing that with me!

[babynerissa.livejournal.com]

I have to admit you fooled me. I read 'Sanguine' at silverhielm suggestion, and I was sure it wasn't yours.
Well, non-con, emotional confusion and mental torture - not to speak of the kinks - were definitively yours, but... I don't know... this Lucius seemed so strange to me, so different from 'your' Lucius.
I really don't know how I, who translated into italian two of your fanfictions, didn't recognize you style! ^^
Though, wonderful piece, with hot wicked sex and great characters.

[amanuensis1.livejournal.com]

Ha! I am just as amused to hear that someone was fooled as I am to hear that someone guessed it right away. That you liked it is praise enough, hee! Thank you so much.

[fiendling.livejournal.com]

holy crap dude... I thought it was you but I just couldnt believe I would be so fortunate D: OMG IT WAS FUCKING FANTASTIC DUDE. as soon as i have some time, I think I will make art for it :D because... gad. woah. DUDE. THANK YOU SO MUCH OH GOD. I have no words other than "dude thank you" pretty much, I am so flabberghasted :P

You're so amazing. Thank you for working so hard and making that wonderful written work all for me (: was just perfect.

are you going to lumos? -.o I can't remember if you were....

gaherkjghakjer *squeeze*

[amanuensis1.livejournal.com]

I have Lumos plans, yes! They are not completely settled but they are PLANS!

I would go NUTS for art for it. NUTS, I tell you. But it was meant as a gift to you so PLEASE do not feel you are obligated to! Only if it would be fun for you to do it! ^_^

[hpstrangelove.livejournal.com]

Just finished this afternoon - wow - simply loved the needles...one of my big fantasies but doesn't get written about often (or maybe I just don't know where to look)...anyway, great job - and the ending...

[amanuensis1.livejournal.com]

I don't see much needleplay in the fandom either, but I admit it's not something I usually seek out--on the other hand, I do seek out stories that are likely to be explicitly dirty and harsh! ^_^ If you thought that in particular worked then I am VERY flattered, thank you!

[dreamred.livejournal.com]

Wow. I'd say that was among one of your most disturbing fics. It was beautifully written as always, with all those exquisite details you manage to include. And as always, I'm blown away by your use of language and characterisation.

[amanuensis1.livejournal.com]

You dear, thank you so much! You give me so many superlatives I can hardly connect them to my own writings, if that makes any sense. ^_^ *hugs you*

[wolvies-wench.livejournal.com]

First fic of yours I'd read and I absolutly loved it... I so hope you do a companion piece to it. Say... Harry coping with his Master gone, and still needing the scene. I so see him running to Severus and Draco. Draco would be so afraid of being replaced... Sorry, my mind just ran off a bit.

[amanuensis1.livejournal.com]

I love inspiring fantasies, whee! And that one is delicious, no lie. I am seriously going to percolate on that one and see if it inspires!

[tori-siikanen.livejournal.com]

HA! I knew it as soon as I read that one that you wrote it! I feel triumph at having recognized your stuff already.

(Oh and did you know that one of your stories is excerpted on a website about figging? I don't have the link off the top, I was just roaming around looking for more EEEEE! material for something I'm working on...)

[amanuensis1.livejournal.com]

Someone DID show that to me! It completely blew my mind and put me in a goofy grin-state for DAYS. XD

[twistedrecesses.livejournal.com]

Again, hadn't time to read before, but wow. That was excellent. The aloof first person narrative was perfect for Lucius, and the entire story wound out beautifully. Great work.

[amanuensis1.livejournal.com]

You dear, thank you so much for reading and reviewing! "Aloof," yeah, that's Lucius's middle name, innit. ^_^

[glockgal.livejournal.com]

YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEHEEEEEEE (PS - my heart is beating, like. Really fast. I didn't quite notice until now.)

When the cell door is flung open, it is hardly the most surprising moment of my life.

Right from the beginning hon. I just love how you write Lucius Malfoy. He is so incredibly stately and dignified by his words alone. Like when I read him the way you write him, I see his actions in OoTP as more a series of unfortunate events that happened to a formidible man like him, instead of a series of blunders made by a pompous fool. It's fantastic, because I like this version better and I like how he suits my canon from the books.

When I cast off the prison robe at the entrance to the bathroom, Greyback leers in a way that isn't at all sexual.

Eee I love the little details like this. What I wouldn't do to have a walk through your brain!

"Oh, no," says Greyback. "Your man Snape saw to that."

The best part of this? Obviously I knew this, I knew what happened, but I still feel the drama and shock of the moment, like. It was such a pleasure to read about Fenrir saying this to Lucius! And that you cut it off right there. I. And. Eeeeeeeeeeeeee.

It does not matter if he believes me, only that my words please him. They do.

Love their wordy interplay. It makes me feel like I'm reading the clever language of noblemen playing a very dangerous and clever game.

What should I give him--a gulp of relief? Bite my lips as though suppressing a greater reaction?

I love it. Loooove it. My stomach is all clenched in axiety during this whole conversation, it's to strangely tension-packed!

It is almost the prelude to a romantic declaration.

*stifles laughter* I! I can hear the dry incredulous tone of this delivery and!


"I let him live. Not dead, no, not dead. Life-debt discharged." Another, harder nudge, another, more irritating giggle. "Yours, my lord. I've not killed him. That's for you to choose, not me. Discharged."

"It's not there," he says. "No more than the summary of what we already know. My lord."


I transport him under silent immobility to the manor. Potter's eyes are open and I can imagine the frantic thoughts behind them

God, I am, like, so terrified at this moment. I love that even through Lucius's POV, I can see feel the terror and horrible anticipation of what's to come. I feel so scared for Harry, it makes me almost want to stop reading! Which of course I wont, because I need to know what happens. But nevertheless -eeep!

He sucks in breath, twists his head to avoid it, and when the cloth goes over his eyes, says, "No--don't--" and just barely keeps away from the word please.

*incoherent flailing and near-heart attack*

I'll not have him begging with this alone, I suspect, but neither will he be able to stay silent.

I just LOVE that Lucius knows and understand this, like. He has a slight sort of....I wouldn't even call it grudging respect, just more that he knows, like. He knows that this would be the way that Harry would want to behave in a situation like this. He is fully aware that in this, it's Harry who's the 'hero'. Fantastic.


Realizing and yielding are not the same thing, of course, but the two are never long apart. He whimpers. Does not plead again.

akjdfahkjhf! It's the psychology of it all! Like the mental conflictions that are, most definitely the best part of this. Lucius is like. So much


. "Ssh," I repeat, kissing him again, feeling the lack of resistance in him, the wordless surrender that begs not to be hurt any more, the promise to be good.

Okay, um. So, I just feel the need to tell you: after that entire play from the time Lucius starts with the needles until right now? You have successfully made me putty in your hands. I am melting and soft and gooshy and just. Wow. If I stand up, I'm sure my legs'll be all jelly.

"Don't," he says, trying not to let it become a whine, the dear brave thing.

Remember how I was trying to explain how Lucius can understand Harry, not in an empathizing way but just, like. He knows him and feels something for him that's not quite respect? Yup. Right here. It's crazy. You're crazy! But in the best way possible, for true.

[glockgal.livejournal.com]

There is no need to immobilize him this time; once he is free of the manacles he slides from the table into my helpful arms, utterly unresisting, not clutching, no, but too much in need of comfort and contact to push his abuser away.

*pushed to near-tears* Honey, can you make a movie for me one day please? And then it'll be both beautiful and horrifying and get so much critical acclaim while still being disturbing and wrong but oh, so right because you really are just that good. I'm taking slow, deep breaths right now, yes I am!


Later I pull him into my arms and hold him spoon-fashion against me, feeling him as he does not sleep, does not cry, does not plead. Knowing that the run of his thoughts is better self-torment than any night in a dungeon.

Maybe it's because I just haven't read one of your longer fics in a long while? But I really can't decide whether I want to pull at my hair or laugh hysterically or cry or just stare into nothing. Your writing is always, always so much more than mere physical recordings, it's an complete experience in itself.

I let him know the twitch has not escaped me: I smile. "Pity you weren't quicker to speak up. A most pleasant duty, I find."

I earn a scowl. Rapture.

*giggles in a happy fangirlish way* Oh my god, thank you! I think you broke the tension building in my head at the exact right time. Yay!


hid it because he could not let me know, let any of us know that he had split his soul and I had not merely failed to resurrect him, I had destroyed one of his horcruxes.

Now I understand my term in Azkaban even better. It is a miracle he ever decided to fetch me out.

Ohhhhhhh myyyyy gooooood I love you, like, so very much. I can't believe you delved this much and so perfectly into Lucius' mind and made such an exquisitely perfect connection between two points in canon and I feel like screaming with joy about the brilliance that is you!!! So fantastic. So very incredibly cool! It's like when I'm reading a comic book and the newest writer on the helm manages to connect some old piece of canon and transform it into something amazing and 'omfg, why didn't I think of that?!' worthy. Eeee. Maybe I jsut don't travel in fanfic circles, but this is masterful, really.

He promised us these things because of his faith in the horcruxes.

Also? I love, like, so very much, that you maintain that the Death Eaters don't know about horcruxes. Now I'm just really really hoping JKR follows the same structure, because that is just like OMG so cool.

Merlin help me. I chose the wrong side after all.

You are the coolest EVER.

And I breathe, and I say, "Oh, but--my lord..." in exactly the bewildered, protesting way I know I must.

Sorry, Glock must be sent to the hospital now because she has been successfully KO'd with the most amazing head-punch, like, ever. So when can I come live and play in your world, please? I'm already packed! I am!

Now I know why they call him hero.

*falls into your arms*

It must be true--that they are the ones who know what Voldemort does not?

Of course they--

I don't think I've ever been more caught up and enamoured and thrown between a multitude of emotions with any other fanfic. That was absolutely incredible. It was seriously built and structured, to me, like a movie. I was watching a movie, but I was watching it be reading. That was so amazingly and beautifully constructed. I love Lucius, I love how you write him, I love that he never loses his morals or beliefs or comprimises in any way, he is always Lucius Malfoy and my god you've not only made me like him, you've made me love him.

I'm gonna go...no, I don't even know what to do with myself right now. I'm in shock. Happy, wonderful, fullfilled, melancholy shock.

*clings*

fangirling and feedback

[slave2haldir.livejournal.com]

Hi, I just read Sanguine, a Serpent Knotted Sable and I have to say that I hate love hate love you SO MUCH. I'm a big fan of your writing, but this is by far the most excruciating read I've ever come across. The bdsm and the breathplay were hot, and you had me cringing in my seat during the needle scene. I loved Lucius' inner confusion and torment, as well as his "plan" to save Draco.

BUT THE ENDING JUST CUT OFF LIKE THAT? ARGH!
I want more, I want a conclusion! But the brilliant thing is that life doesn't give resolutions, and you captured that so wonderfully. I'll probably be still spazzing over it a few hours from now.

Excellent work! :D You are truly the goddess of HPfic.

Re: fangirling and feedback

[amanuensis1.livejournal.com]

Oh, thank you so much! Heh, yeah, I'm afraid I went into the story knowing it was going to end like that; death is like that, doesn't even give you time to have cool last words. This is SO sweet of you, this feedback. *hugs*

[nadia98.livejournal.com]

..Dear sweet lord, I just finished being teary eyed. Your fics with Lucius always make me teary. The emotion you put into the characters are so fsckin real!! It's amazing! This such a long fic, and I'm horrible with reading fics from beginning to end, but your fics are always an exception. You are definetely what got me writing on the HP slash fandom...dear lord, you are such an inspiration and this piece is an incredible artwork! Why the crap can't you get paid for this?! I know I knowm copyright laws and all, but jesus lord on toast that's some good writing! So intense! And the ending, I literally stared at the screen for a whole minute or two with my mouth wide open...I was like "guh....gwuh?! nawhh" and then it became coherent-"what?! No!...No way!" and then formed full sentences- "But, what happens! I want to know! I will plead! What happened!?:"
But even if you did tell me, I don't think I'd be satisfied, I satisfied being unsatisfied, if that makes any sense. You always amaze me, love.
Dear Lord, keep up the good work,
Or I'll kidnap you, have you on my bed and you shall write for me, ofcourse I will provide the writing intruments and food n stuff..because I think you'll write better when happy..Hmm..
I just realize how much of your non con has obviously affected my way of thinking aka the above description of kidnapping you for my pleasure ^_^
Ehh..sleep now, yay!!
love n shiz

[amanuensis1.livejournal.com]

This WAS a long fic. I was all but moaning about that! "C'mon, can't I just cut to the smut?" But the story structure wouldn't let me; I shortchanged the thing as it was, I thought. ^_^

I promised meta on this thing ages ago but I'm at the point where I doubt anyone cares. I still would like to get my act in gear and write a little meta on it that doesn't come off whiny!

Your offer of food and a comfortable place to write is not unappreciated, believe me. *hugs happily*