![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
amanuensis1*laughing again, because every new realization about my reaction to this fandom is cracking me up* Oh, man, this is not only just like Harry Potter was ten years ago in the obsession and the sleeplessness and the need to write and read ALL THE FIC, but in the type of fic I'm writing, too.
First I started with the story that spoke to my heart but can't yet finish because I'm still fighting the characters in my head to sound the way I think they should, and they keep telling me that they know better; then I interrupt it to create the darkest thing I can imagine for my viewpoint character, stroking and stabbing at the fic because it's the first that's going to go up and how dare it not be perfect, and then yesterday, finally, the story that I dashed off in five effortless hours of frenzy that I can't describe any other way than "cozy, fluffy non-con." Oh my god, there is just no other term.
It's exactly the kind of thing I used to dash off in HP fandom, short little non-con pieces with premise rather than plot, that can tuck right into an imagined storyline without creating more than a bump, designed to allow the villain to posture and the story to climax when he does. If mystery fiction has its "cozies," then so does non-con smut. I've decided this, and I've decided it's a trait of mine.
(Default Lucius icon, honey? You stay right where you are, for the moment. Trust me, this is homage.)
And it's a gift for my best guy. When I fell into HP fandom I forced him to come with me, and, guys, this is the man who dealt with his girlfriend's (me) conversion to male/male fantasy fodder all those years ago and has indulged it nonstop every, every day, because he loves me and he's the greatest thing ever. And I haven't even had to drag him into Avengers; he's fallen for the fandom nearly as hard as I have. Before I leap full force into the slash that beckons, I'm so glad I could write him some non-con het as a tiny thank you.
Conversation which inspired this:
Me: Hey, sweetie, check out this fandomsecret. It's WONDERFUL. This person confessed that she fell really hard for Loki in the film, and she and her husband roleplayed Natasha/Loki all day and it ended with the hottest roleplay non-con sex imaginable.
S.O.: Oh, my god. That's beautiful. That's so US.
Me: You like that idea? That pairing?
S.O.: Are you KIDDING?
Me: ...wait, wait, I'm getting the premise! Let me call you back!
So, yeah, going to be staggering about on reduced sleep again today. And HE LIKED IT. *hugs S.O. to death* I love you, sweetheart.
The other joy of dashing this off is that it proved to me that, yes, my Loki has a voice, and there's no point in fighting it to be anything else right now; if I want that voice to be different it will come in time. It's not![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
astolat's Loki (but, I have to face it, no one else's is, oh, god, why can't I write like that, Revelations is KILLING me, just slaying me dead with the beauty), whose Loki-voice I would give years off my life to be able to write, but he's my Loki, and at the moment I have to accept that. And I kind of like him, when I do.
Yanno, when I finished seeing the film, I said out loud, "Natasha was terrific. I don't identify with her, I absolutely and completely cannot feel the inside of her head, but she's a great character." So, YEAH, did not expect my first two fics in this fandom to be Natasha-centric, jeebus. And I have to apologize to Clint for making him the damsel in this one. Yes, AGAIN. CLINT I PROMISE YOU YOU WILL ACTUALLY GET TO DO THINGS IN MY FUTURE FICS. NO, REALLY.
First I started with the story that spoke to my heart but can't yet finish because I'm still fighting the characters in my head to sound the way I think they should, and they keep telling me that they know better; then I interrupt it to create the darkest thing I can imagine for my viewpoint character, stroking and stabbing at the fic because it's the first that's going to go up and how dare it not be perfect, and then yesterday, finally, the story that I dashed off in five effortless hours of frenzy that I can't describe any other way than "cozy, fluffy non-con." Oh my god, there is just no other term.
It's exactly the kind of thing I used to dash off in HP fandom, short little non-con pieces with premise rather than plot, that can tuck right into an imagined storyline without creating more than a bump, designed to allow the villain to posture and the story to climax when he does. If mystery fiction has its "cozies," then so does non-con smut. I've decided this, and I've decided it's a trait of mine.
(Default Lucius icon, honey? You stay right where you are, for the moment. Trust me, this is homage.)
And it's a gift for my best guy. When I fell into HP fandom I forced him to come with me, and, guys, this is the man who dealt with his girlfriend's (me) conversion to male/male fantasy fodder all those years ago and has indulged it nonstop every, every day, because he loves me and he's the greatest thing ever. And I haven't even had to drag him into Avengers; he's fallen for the fandom nearly as hard as I have. Before I leap full force into the slash that beckons, I'm so glad I could write him some non-con het as a tiny thank you.
Conversation which inspired this:
Me: Hey, sweetie, check out this fandomsecret. It's WONDERFUL. This person confessed that she fell really hard for Loki in the film, and she and her husband roleplayed Natasha/Loki all day and it ended with the hottest roleplay non-con sex imaginable.
S.O.: Oh, my god. That's beautiful. That's so US.
Me: You like that idea? That pairing?
S.O.: Are you KIDDING?
Me: ...wait, wait, I'm getting the premise! Let me call you back!
So, yeah, going to be staggering about on reduced sleep again today. And HE LIKED IT. *hugs S.O. to death* I love you, sweetheart.
The other joy of dashing this off is that it proved to me that, yes, my Loki has a voice, and there's no point in fighting it to be anything else right now; if I want that voice to be different it will come in time. It's not
astolat's Loki (but, I have to face it, no one else's is, oh, god, why can't I write like that, Revelations is KILLING me, just slaying me dead with the beauty), whose Loki-voice I would give years off my life to be able to write, but he's my Loki, and at the moment I have to accept that. And I kind of like him, when I do.Yanno, when I finished seeing the film, I said out loud, "Natasha was terrific. I don't identify with her, I absolutely and completely cannot feel the inside of her head, but she's a great character." So, YEAH, did not expect my first two fics in this fandom to be Natasha-centric, jeebus. And I have to apologize to Clint for making him the damsel in this one. Yes, AGAIN. CLINT I PROMISE YOU YOU WILL ACTUALLY GET TO DO THINGS IN MY FUTURE FICS. NO, REALLY.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2012-05-23 12:24 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-05-23 12:33 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-05-23 12:44 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-05-23 01:28 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-05-23 12:57 pm (UTC)(OMG ASTOLAT. I spent last weekend reeling over their Chaos War, which seriously rendered me speechless and wishing that I could write like that someday. But that's a whole different story, and one that I am still considering dedicating an entire user!rec post to.) Ahem.
no subject
Date: 2012-05-23 01:26 pm (UTC)ETA: CHAOS WAR. Oh my god. That story. Oh my god.
no subject
Date: 2012-05-23 04:13 pm (UTC)I remember starting to write my fic, then somehow finding Chaos War online, and just being like "...why do I even bother -_-" But her stuff is terrific inspiration, and so wonderful to read. I need to sit down and read Chaos War again. And go back when she's finished Revelations.
no subject
Date: 2012-05-23 01:44 pm (UTC)Also, you must have the best S.O. ever. :D
no subject
Date: 2012-05-24 01:25 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-05-23 01:48 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-05-24 01:26 am (UTC)*gigglefits* I SHARE THE BAD TASTE. Mmm, villains.
no subject
Date: 2012-05-23 01:51 pm (UTC)You are the best.
no subject
Date: 2012-05-24 01:27 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-05-23 02:49 pm (UTC)I'm just sitting in the corner laughing my head off at this, and imagining the conversation in MY house...
no subject
Date: 2012-05-24 01:32 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-05-24 01:42 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-05-23 03:01 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-05-24 01:35 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-05-23 03:06 pm (UTC)I am also about to have Tony run into an unexpectedly half-dressed, damp insomniac Steve in his hallway, and kind of choke on his tongue a bit. The best part is going to be writing Clint and Natasha witnessing the whole thing, I think.
Oh, and also, this might not need saying, but can we trade beta duties now that we both know the source material again? I kinda miss that about us.
no subject
Date: 2012-05-24 01:41 am (UTC)SQUEEE oh, that sounds so delicious! Ye gods, the idea of you writing Steve/Tony, your writing on these characters, oh my god, I may have a mini-stroke right here.
The best part is going to be writing Clint and Natasha witnessing the whole thing, I think.
You--oh, my GOD, you don't know what image you just gave to me. I just realized that Clint and Natasha could fit so well into the stereotype of "twins" characters, whispering like schoolkids that the teacher needs to separate. Now I really need someone to draw me the crossover cast of Avengers High School Host Club. I may have to go begging someone for this.
The idea of trading betas with you again has me SWOONING. Oh, yes, a thousand times yes!! *smoooooches*
no subject
Date: 2012-05-23 04:11 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-05-24 01:42 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-05-23 04:38 pm (UTC)This is just how I feel. Except with less writing and all the art. <33
I've been lurking in comic book fandoms for a long time, I guess I just need needed something to push me (like that slash-tastic movie). Also, the reason I don't write much anymore is probably because I slash-tastic is a word.
no subject
Date: 2012-05-24 02:07 am (UTC)I still maintain the film was called "Would You All Just F**K Already."
ART! Oh, goody, yes, please!
no subject
Date: 2012-05-24 02:20 am (UTC)I agree with this. Yes.
Art so far is here: Bruce/Steve (http://pinkelephant42.livejournal.com/153340.html), Tony/Steve (http://archiveofourown.org/works/408985). (Both have naked men, so NWS).
no subject
Date: 2012-05-23 06:24 pm (UTC)I can't fucking wait to read whatever it is you're writing.
no subject
Date: 2012-05-24 02:10 am (UTC)*smooches you*
no subject
Date: 2012-05-23 10:36 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-05-24 02:12 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-05-23 11:36 pm (UTC)Loki is a fanfic writer's dream come true. Born to be bad, raised to be good, torn between the two extremes, in a love/hate relationship with the man who raised him and the brother he was raised with, brilliant and clever and absolutely lost. Not to mention cute. What's not to love?
no subject
Date: 2012-05-24 02:14 am (UTC)Such a great assessment of Loki! Redeem him or let him wallow in the badness; you can make a case either direction. Yay for versatility! (And cuteness. Mustn't forget the cute.)
no subject
Date: 2012-05-23 11:51 pm (UTC)I do have to say that I've been a comics fan since childhood (although the last decade or so of Marvel & DC have me scratching my head as to who exactly the audience is supposed to be), so it wasn't any great tug to get me into Avengers fandom -- I was already there. (Mmmm... Scarlet Witch in a corset.) The HP stuff, however -- totally true. Dragged in kicking and screaming... not. ;) To this day I'm an ardent Harry/Hermione shipper, but damn if some of the other stuff ain't amazingly sexy, especially when read to me in a sultry voice by my sweetie.
Anyway, thanks for the kind words, and wait till you read the story! YOWZAH!
no subject
Date: 2012-05-24 02:18 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-05-24 03:19 am (UTC)... SUCH A DUTCH OVEN! Crap crap crap --
... SUCH A COPPER-BOTTOMED PRESSURE COOKER! Oh, for --
:D
... SUCH A PAN!!!
no subject
Date: 2012-05-27 12:13 am (UTC)I wish I knew what event it was from!