amanuensis1: (Default)
amanuensis1 ([personal profile] amanuensis1) wrote2005-01-01 09:04 pm

Random drabble! SS/RL and some silliness.

Can't quite recreate the gist of what spawned (heh) this--it involved Snape, and Lupin, and Snape/Lupin, and mpreg, and the postpartum behavior of werewolves, and...well, I didn't exactly write this so much as compile it. It belongs to me, [livejournal.com profile] gmth, [livejournal.com profile] maeglinyedi, [livejournal.com profile] fluffyllama, [livejournal.com profile] nimori, and [livejournal.com profile] blackdracaena.




"Morning. Any of that chocolate chip ice cream left in the icebox?"

"You and your untimely cravi--"

The tea mug slipped from Severus's hands and shattered on the floor.

"You're...you're..."

"Hm?" said Remus, barely sparing the mess of shattered ceramic and hot water a glance. "Oh, yes, that."

"'That'? Lupin, you're--you've--"

"Father of my children and he still calls me by my last name," Remus said, shooting a winning smile over his shoulder before returning to rummage in the freezer.

"Ch-children, plural?"

"Why, yes." Remus--the clearly-no-longer-pregnant Remus--turned back from the icebox, chocolate-chip-festooned prize in hand, and crossed to the drawer for a spoon.

"You had them? This morning?"

"Functional term is 'whelped.'" He swallowed ice cream before continuing. "All six of them."

Seveurs realized he'd better sit. "Are they--upstairs?"

"Ah. Not exactly. I ate them."

Severus hadn't believed his jaw could fall farther, but clearly something had prompted Remus to shrug one shoulder and say, "Well, it's hungry work, you know. Mmm. Ice cream's great for afters."

*****

[identity profile] lunadeath02.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 02:14 am (UTC)(link)
Dear Lord! O.O

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[identity profile] atdelphi.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 02:19 am (UTC)(link)
...

Best. MPreg. Ever.

[identity profile] amanuensis1.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 02:30 am (UTC)(link)
Most powerful plotbunny ever, I'm tellin' ya!

[identity profile] flimpy.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 02:20 am (UTC)(link)
Oh god you're positively evil.

I love you for it.

*Falls over giggling*

[identity profile] amanuensis1.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 02:33 am (UTC)(link)
It was the result of an evil hive mind, I swear!

[identity profile] snitchnip-chill.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 02:20 am (UTC)(link)
HAAAAAhahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!! He ate them, how brilliant.

[identity profile] amanuensis1.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 02:34 am (UTC)(link)
Werewolves=hamsters. Go on, disprove it, I dare ya!
ext_7739: (percy by vialune)

[identity profile] http://users.livejournal.com/_hannelore/ 2005-01-02 02:21 am (UTC)(link)
*falls over*

You rule the Mpreg world, lady. You RULE it.

[identity profile] amanuensis1.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 02:35 am (UTC)(link)
*dies over icon*
It is my solemn goal to show it can be written as just another plot device!

Oh, and for cheap laughs. Mustn't forget that!

[identity profile] saturn92103.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 02:24 am (UTC)(link)
Ahahahaha! That's brilliant.

[identity profile] amanuensis1.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 02:37 am (UTC)(link)
Too compelling a plotbunny to leave alone! I wish I could have written a longer funny fic for it, but sometimes you gotta go with the one-joke length.
aidenfire: (Default)

[personal profile] aidenfire 2005-01-02 02:26 am (UTC)(link)
BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

Hee, great!

[identity profile] amanuensis1.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 02:38 am (UTC)(link)
I can't help but imagine Remus being all casual about it. Hee.

[identity profile] ponderosa121.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 02:39 am (UTC)(link)
XD So very awesome.

[identity profile] amanuensis1.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 02:54 am (UTC)(link)
That Lupin. He'll eat anything. ^_^

[identity profile] noblerot.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 02:47 am (UTC)(link)
HAHAHA!!! He done et 'em like a hamster. We likes it.

[identity profile] amanuensis1.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 02:55 am (UTC)(link)
Never get your kids a pregnant hamster unless you enjoy explaining the tough stuff!

[identity profile] iibnf.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 02:54 am (UTC)(link)
Ha! Poor, um.... Snape? Babies? I'm not sure who I should be feeling sorry for...

Mind you, wolves don't eat their babies. Although, with Snape as another parent, there's a good chance any puppies could end up as potions ingredients.

Lupin, six nipples, suckling puppies...

ARGH you fucked my brain!

[identity profile] amanuensis1.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 02:59 am (UTC)(link)
Mind you, wolves don't eat their babies.
Hee! Yeah, but Fantastic Beasts etc. didn't say that werewolves did or didn't, so, fair game. ^_^


Although, with Snape as another parent, there's a good chance any puppies could end up as potions ingredients.
Oh, god, more plotbunnies!

[identity profile] bethbethbeth.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 02:56 am (UTC)(link)
I'd be chastising you for your evilness...if I wasn't laughing so hard. *g*

[identity profile] amanuensis1.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 03:00 am (UTC)(link)
The plotbunnies made me do it! And the others in the chatroom, I swear!

[identity profile] gaeta.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 02:57 am (UTC)(link)
Oh my god ... that's just delici..., er, evil!

Poor Severus. Talk about not getting a chance to get used to an idea.

[identity profile] amanuensis1.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 03:01 am (UTC)(link)
Definitely sure that Severus wound up in St. Mungo's over this one!

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ext_5487: (Default)

[identity profile] atalantapendrag.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 03:16 am (UTC)(link)
Wow. Mpreg that doesn't make me want to spork my eyes out on general principle. I am mightily impressed.

[identity profile] amanuensis1.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 03:20 am (UTC)(link)
MPREG is just another plot device! Er, when in a magical universe, that is. (*still reeling at idea of The West Wing mpreg*)

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[identity profile] dementedsiren.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 03:25 am (UTC)(link)
*falls off chair laughing*

Remus the Evil Puppy Eater!

[identity profile] amanuensis1.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 03:26 am (UTC)(link)
He shags Snape! He has babies! He's Remus the Evil Puppy Eater!

[identity profile] lyricalnights.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 03:27 am (UTC)(link)
Ahahaha.... ew.


Certainly one of the more unqiue reactions I've had to fic lately. ;)

[identity profile] amanuensis1.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 03:29 am (UTC)(link)
Ahahaha.... ew.

I shall wear it proudly!

(ooh, love the icon, too!)

[identity profile] silentauror.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 03:37 am (UTC)(link)
Ha ha ha ha ha! That's fucking hilarious! I love it! It also reminds me strongly of a scene from the epilogue of my fic, Dreaming in Colour, which I quote to you now (note: S & R have just returned from tracking down the last of the DE's, with R in a controllable-werewolf potion deal):

Remus shifted uncomfortably. "I'm - er - not all that hungry, actually," he said, sounding a bit awkward.

Harry looked pointedly at Severus. "You're not?" he repeated.

Severus looked up and grinned. "He's full."

"Full of what?" Draco asked.

The grin grew. "He just ate Wormtail this morning."

Harry just stared, somewhat incredulously. Then he looked at Draco, and they started to laugh. "You did?" Harry directed at his godfather. "I thought you didn't like eating people. In werewolf form, of course - I know you don't like eating people in your normal state."

Remus' face had reddened, but he smiled, not looking away from his tea. "He asked for it," he said.

A confused exchange of looks. "He did?" Draco said. "What did he do?"

"No, I mean literally," Remus said, looking up now, and grinning fiendlishly. "He said, and I quote: 'Eat me'."

Severus started to laugh, too. "So, he did," he said.

Harry wiped away tears of mirth. "You're right, I do want to see that for myself," he said. "What did you do, while it was going on?"

"Me? I just stood there and laughed," Severus said, still grinning. "He says he feels sick now, though."


Three cheers for Remus! :) I loved it.

[identity profile] amanuensis1.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 04:03 am (UTC)(link)
HA HA HA HA HA HA!! Oh, that's just perfect. "Eat me." Snerk snort snarfle SNORT!!!

[identity profile] not-sally.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 04:01 am (UTC)(link)
I really don't think I should congratulate you for this drabble, lest you start writing more. My head hurts.

*pets Severus... poor thing*

[identity profile] amanuensis1.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 04:05 am (UTC)(link)
Gotcha. ^_~

[identity profile] blackdracaena.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 04:02 am (UTC)(link)
*dies dies dies*
You're brilliant, Amy!
Oh my.. I can't stop laughing.
*dies again*

[identity profile] amanuensis1.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 04:06 am (UTC)(link)
You were there, and helpin' with the discussion! I'm just the messenger. *smooches*

[identity profile] karasu-hime.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 04:07 am (UTC)(link)
That's ummm...perfectly disturbing. Oh, my!

[identity profile] amanuensis1.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 04:11 am (UTC)(link)
Now I keep seeing your Snupin in this! Turtle-necked pony-tailed Remus leaning against the fridge, hee.

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[identity profile] nadai.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 04:13 am (UTC)(link)
Finally, an mpreg story I liked. But six? Just how big are werewolf puppies? :)

[identity profile] amanuensis1.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 04:36 pm (UTC)(link)
Big as I want them to be, baby! ^_^

[identity profile] angiepen.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 04:24 am (UTC)(link)
OMGWTF! and ROFLMAO! No one's ever gotten both before, but this deserves it if anything does. :D That's wonderful!

Angie, still snickering

[identity profile] amanuensis1.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 04:38 pm (UTC)(link)
Yippee! Am not worthy. Joint effort, really, I swear!

[identity profile] foxsyd.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 04:32 am (UTC)(link)
Ha Ha!! Too funny!

[identity profile] amanuensis1.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 04:41 pm (UTC)(link)
Hee! (And I'm so glad that I get your icon!)

[identity profile] amanuensis1.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 04:43 pm (UTC)(link)
*gives you kiss of life*

[identity profile] warped-factor.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 06:16 am (UTC)(link)
ROTFL!!! I'll never look at werewolf!mpreg the same way again!

[identity profile] amanuensis1.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 04:44 pm (UTC)(link)
I think it's great to know that we look at that kinda thing ordinarily, don't we? ^_^

[identity profile] tocada.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 07:47 am (UTC)(link)
I'm still thinking they should have tasted funny after the "labour" work.

[identity profile] amanuensis1.livejournal.com 2005-01-02 04:45 pm (UTC)(link)
Question is, did he eat the placentas, too? ^_~

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