also, *

Nov. 11th, 2016 07:39 pm
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Those of you needing some kind of uplift for this heavy week: I highly, highly recommend going to see Arrival to remember that there is still amazing creativity and beauty in this world.

(*and jeremy renner's perfect dorky grin)
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So I stood in front of the checkout guy at Barnes & Noble and presented the July/August Playboy magazine (with the Jeremy Renner interview, of course) for purchase and said, "I really am buying this for the interview, I know everyone says that but I had the compulsion to tell you anyway even though I know it doesn't matter to you in the least," and happily he had a good sense of humor and giggled with me.
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All right, who failed to tell me there was a fabulous Jeremy Renner reference in the first five minutes of Birdman? I'd have seen it long before this!

(The fact that it won a Best Picture Oscar which essentially means everyone thought it was a movie worth seeing--not an excuse. Get with it, people.)

(And yes, Birdman was terrific.)
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I am running out of unwatched Jeremy Renner movies, so I got a Jimmy Cagney film to watch in the meantime.

When is someone gonna make a Jimmy Cagney biopic for Renner to star in, darnit? This is necessary.
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I'm going to see the Thor-The Avengers-Thor 2 marathon tomorrow! I never do marathons! But I figure I can sleep and take breaks during the first two films plus I get to see Hawkeye's appearances in 3-D all over again. Totally worth it.
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So I saw this "Empire's 100 Sexiest Movie Stars (as voted by fans)," and instantly I could feel the anxiety and the nausea beginning; and I started to search the male list from the top down, and there I was, thinking, "If Jeremy Renner is not on this, I'm going to be sick and sick to my stomach all night and depressed and I'm going to have to go to bed early, goddammit." And he was number 21 and instantly my evening is joyful.

Yeah, I still got it bad.

(All the Avengers made it on there! Ruffalo too, yay!)

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Never thought I'd get this uploaded! I promised pics, and I took several hundred of them a few weeks ago. Here's 12 of my favorites, ranging from what I call the "Go, my hawk" pose to some seriously slashy stuff (but nothing lewd).


Twelve Hawkeye-Loki Hot Toys figures pictures beneath the cut. )

Also available on Tumblr:
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I am glad I could recognize that Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters was not a good movie, as the majority of critics have agreed, because it means I'm not that Renner-blind. The script's not good. The humor timing's off. It should be more consistently funny but it can't really settle on its tone. In premise, it's very much up my alley--irreverent fairy-tale anachronistic self-parody comedy action flick--but in execution it suffered.

Having said that, it's still enjoyable! I liked it ever, ever, EVER so much better than the snoozefest that was Snow White and the Huntsman, and I'm serious when I say it had some of the best fight sequences I've seen onscreen. I am so sick of slo-mo and of rapid-fire cuts that obscure the beatings being dished out; because of the well-done sequencing in this one I actually could follow the hand-to-hand fights, what a concept. I enjoyed the story, and I really enjoyed the film's intentions--see above, about how I'm exactly the audience for fairy tales, anachronisms, and irreverence--and it was never dull. And there are genuinely funny giggle-like-an-idiot moments, just not enough of them.

And the actors aren't to be faulted.

Me: Jeremy's doing a damn good Snake Plissken in this, isn't he?
S.O.: Hell, Gemma's doing a damn good Snake Plissken!

They are both also very, very, very pretty in this, despite, and because of, being covered in battle gore for quite a lot of it. While I was itching to take a corrective pen to the script and give the director a lesson in irony timing, I regret not one moment. Come to me, sweet DVD.

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What I find entertaining about this picture is that my mom and I have serious crushes on the two men in the picture, her on one, me on the other. And in both cases? We each like our crush best in his role of Hawkeye. ^_^
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Like I was going to let today go by without an edition of JR: PLR. (There was also cake!)
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I know that today Jeremy Renner is supposed to be on the Today Show (I had a bad dream last night that I couldn't get the DVR to work, of course)

And my tv newscast just announced

that today People Magazine is going to announce who they picked as Sexiest Man Alive

and guys guys I know this is probably not Jeremy's year; it's probably going to Tatum Channing or whatever the hell his name is

but guys guys

for one hour this morning, just let me dreeeeeeeeaaaaaaaam.

*lies on floor and sobs a little*

ETA: omigod, the show has started and they haven't said anything about him being on the show
they just showed the magazine with a silhouette of the person; it fits his body type and hairstyle, aaaaaaaaagh
you guys are going to laugh at me so hard when it's not him, aren't you. duncare.

ETA again: just, walking away from this whole hope right now because everything just keeps escalating. Am assuming it will be Tating Chanum and reassuring all my JR pictures he's still my number one celeb. *smooches*
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I am way more excited than anyone should be that "The Hurt Locker" was an answer on Jeopardy tonight.

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Happy Halloween, everybody! I saw some folks in the Northeast U.S. checked in today to say they were okay, and I'm glad. Though it still sounds like there's a lot of power outages and cleanup to be had among you. I hope it goes quickly. *hugs*

In JR: PLR news, Jeremy Renner will be hosting Saturday Night Live on November 17. As one tumblr user has put it, "I'M NOT CRYING IT'S JUST VIOLENTLY RAINING ON MY FACE. LEAVE ME HERE TO DIE."

Without trying to make drama over it, I look at the further changes that appear to be coming to Livejournal and have decided it's time for me to a) give some money to Dreamwidth, b) import my LJ to DW, c) gussy up my DW, and d) start crossposting. I'll stay around LJ as long as it's tolerable, but, yeah. It's time for these measures.
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Finally I found an online copy of the caricature that was used to accompany Libby Gelman-Waxner's Entertainment Weekly humor column touching on The Bourne Legacy, in which she praises Jeremy Renner's acting ability and in a roundabout way his looks:
"Jeremy is also thuggishly sexy; he looks like Daniel Craig with the mumps."

Full-size pic behind the cut )
Art by Kirsten Ulve. Left to right, Justin Theroux, Jennifer Aniston, Jeremy Renner, Rachel Weisz. Hel-lo, hatchmarked facial hair!
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So since I got the Avengers Blu-Ray/DVD combo on Tuesday, I have watched:

-The Avengers in English.

-The Avengers in English as I joined in the community liveblogging over on [ profile] be_compromised.

-The Avengers in English with the S.O., with full permission to riff on it--if we could. We knew that probably wasn't going to happen, as it's darned hard to riff something that's funny in the first place. After one half-hearted, "Bring worms," in response to, "The Hawk? In his nest," I pretty much gave up trying to be humorous and we mostly just chorused our favorite lines with the film ("Then put it on the left!"). I also made a point of freezing the film at 38 min. 50 sec. on the pretext of "Hey, let's have cake! While the screen just...sits here. And I...stare at it. While I eat cake." The S.O. indulges me shamefully. Good times.

-The Avengers in French (partly with the S.O.). That was a whole different brand of fun! My French is quite limited, but enough to catch some of the lines and enjoy hearing how they translated ("Juste douze pour cent c'est mon bébé?"). Riffing is more entertaining that way too; every lame "Votre père smelt of elderberries!" joke gets giggles. Great voice casting, too. French Loki has a particularly great timbre. French Tony (while awesome) gets the deep sexy voice that I would have thought French Nick Fury would have got.

-I have not watched any of the Blu-Ray features because I don't have a Blu-Ray player. Grr. Well, at least most of those leaked to the net last month.

-I've seen nearly all of The Avengers Second Screen experience app. (Turns out you don't need a Blu-Ray to sync it; it sound synced quite easily off the DVD.) There are still glitches with some of the video and storyboard frames, but, man, the behind-the-scenes trivia and CGI effect tech are a fan's dream, and I am just making squealy toddlerfists hoping someone is able to upload the "Stunt team enacts the entire fight scene" videos for everyone to experience. They're terrific.

Still haven't let myself wath the Joss Whedon commentary track. I'm pretty sure, based on the few bits I've heard about, that when I do watch it I'll need a box of tissues at my side 'cos I'll be crying with fangirl feels all the way through.

And since you were probably wondering--and as it doubles for an edition of JR: PLR--this is the image at 38 min. 50 sec.

Excuse me while I eat cake.
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I came home in Too Licked To LJ/Too Tired To Tumblr mode and went straight for a nap rather than the computer. Which means THIS has been out for hours and I DIDN'T KNOW, o the chaotic unfairness of the universe:

Omigod, it looks like a version of Van Helsing that actually gets the joke! That recognizes Shoot 'Em Up Action Fantasy film is a camp genre. (Which Van Helsing failed to do. Yes, I'm still bitter over that film.) Yay that this looks intentionally funny. Bring it!
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Let's start with this: can I have a movie just devoted to Jeremy Renner putting on jackets? Jeremy Renner Putting On Jackets would be my favorite film ever.

I'm surprised that I actually have things to say about The Bourne Legacy. I thought this post would be me saying, "Jeremy Renner is a beautiful, beautiful man," and that would be pretty much it, but I kinda have a review, wow.

First off, yes, I've seen the Bourne trilogy, for certain values of "seen." I am in that lonely, bewildered small portion of Americans who feels essentially nothing for Matt Damon*, so, I watched the first Bourne film ages ago because it was the thing to do. I felt no connection with the film at all, and did not plan to bother with any more of them. The past couple of weeks I decided to rent the other two just to have any bit of background that might enhance viewing of Legacy, so I put them on and basically did other stuff while they played. Still no emotional connection.

But I got the pattern: action sequence-talky suits-action sequence-talky suits etc. It's fine, whatever. I like my spy movies James Bondish, where the story follows Bond 100% and when there isn't action he is one of the talky suits (usually giving them the side-eye to tell them what he thinks of all the time-wasting talking). But in Bourne the suits are all The Conspiracy Brigade and the hero himself is their target. Different, I get that. Didn't really suck me in. May have been the Matt Damon factor.

The pattern of action sequence-talky suits-action sequence goes off a little in Legacy, it turns out. What we get for the first half is character establishment and an abundance of talky suits; apparently the creators felt that the talky suit stuff is what makes the Bourne series recognizably Bourneish. It may be true, but I'd hazard that viewers are watching more for the action sequence portions. I dunno, someone who likes these films tell me if that's true?

Granted, in Legacy, the tension in the character establishment stuff is high. There is a little action at times to justify all that tension. And granted those characters are interesting and they are played by Jeremy Renner and Rachel Weisz, who do a hell of a job with what they're given.

Dr. Marta I'll-Never-Remember-Her-Last-Name looks harried and everywoman, though when the crisis does come at last she becomes someone whose skin I slipped into like a well-worn glove, fwoop. (Scientist forced to recognize the applied outcomes of her work? Yeah, all too easy for me to identify with that.) Aaron Cross starts out intriguing from the film's opening shot, and also likeable, with flashes of "I am already a deeply suspicious guy and well I should be," and he's right, what with people trying to kill him just because they created him, so that does a lot towards building sympathy, though my viewer sympathy for him didn't really solidify until midway through the film. Where, not coincidentally, everything solidifies in the film: the action ramp-up, the excitement, the character connections to the audience. And that's because it's the moment (and the way) our two leads meet. The danger they're in, the way Cross treats Marta and carries her through the crisis, the way he learns she treats him when she's not under fire, and the way he makes her wake up to her ethical responsibilities...suddenly I had two heroes to root for.

Which made the second half edge-of-my-seat riveting. And it couldn't have been so riveting if they hadn't taken such care in the first half showing the quietness of Marta's life, setting up the situation that blows her quiet life apart, turns her into someone on the run. It works, but I fear it works at the expense of some viewers losing patience with the first half of the film. So I get the mixed reviews for this. Me, the non-Bourne fan who just went in to watch Renner's performance--I'm a special case and not the general audience. So my perspective may be interesting but not a reliable indicator for whether this film works. The take among respected critics is about fifty-fifty for liking this film, which feels about right to me. I really, really liked the second half of this film, and by extension it made me like the first half in retrospect.

There are specific character moments that melted me--moments that you didn't know were vital for making you like the characters, and then they hit and I went, holy cripes, if we hadn't had that moment I would never have even known what I missed in not having it and that would have been tragic. I literally did choke up and get teary-eyed in a sweetly scripted hurt-comfort moment, and it was because of the dialogue, not because anyone happened to be shirtless at the time, thank you very much. One observation of mine hit me hard enough that it makes me want to wrangle it out into metafic. Just the one, but I might have to do it.

I would like the film to do well at the box office. I want studios to offer Renner all the roles. Because he's a beautiful, beautiful man.

(First image in my dream film, Jeremy Renner Putting On Jackets.)

(*I love The Departed and Dogma, and I'm glad Damon's the villain in both of them. It makes it easier.)
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Because it happens, I was reading something today and discovered that the abbreviation for poly-ADP ribose polymerase is PARP, which amused me no end. (Or I suppose I should say it amused me alot.

In today's edition of JR: PLR, a photo from 2010, during his appearance with Jimmy Fallon.

I do not try to explain to myself why this picture is one of my favorites. All I know is, when I look at it my fingers make involuntary pinching motions of glee.
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I'm in a ridiculous headspace right now. My emotional well-being is wrapped up in worries over whether my crush's new movie does well, if his reviews are good, if he does well emotionally with this film's release, if he's actually enjoying his work...this is ridiculous, and I recognize that. Doesn't make it any easier to slip this headspace. Why can't I just jump about happily and squee over going to see the film tomorrow?

Definitely in the "denial" stage of Life Ruiner effect. Sigh.

Well, let's get on with fun distracting things. I actually saw this about a week after The Avengers came out but kept forgetting to upload it:

NOT from a church sign generator. I took this in my car as I drove by. Had to circle the block once because I was laughing so hard.
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Fannish multi-post:

1. Non-Avengers related: a few weeks ago Entertainment Weekly had an article on The 50 Best Movies You've Never Seen." I was astonished to see Perfect Blue made the list! I adore this film. Perfect Blue is not my usual kind of flick, being a stalker drama with the premise, "Pop star tries to shed squeaky-clean image and embrace an edgier actor career, to the dismay of some fans" but the take-home message I got from it was "she damn well deserves to have her new adult image if she wants; screw the stalkers and slut-shamers!" which went against everything I was expecting, hooray! (And I love the pop songs. Wish I could find the English recordings of those.)

Avengers related (of course);

2. I...may have...madeandorderedthesefromConverse:

Yes, you can make custom Converse sneakers. I saw a whole series of Avengers-themed ones someone had designed and leapt right on that bandwagon.

(I don't even wear sneakers. I haven't owned a pair in a decade. DON'T CARE.)

3. I'm getting a lot of my Avengers/Jeremy Renner fix from tumblr these days. I found an adorable underfollowed Renner-weighted fanart tumblr that ought to have a signal boost: (she does Sherlock, too!)

I am this artist's perfect fan. Yes, that first one is CHIBI JEFFREY DAHMER and I SAID "D'AWWWW" WHEN I SAW IT.

4. Because I cannot look directly at this photorealistic fanart of Hawkeye by Sheridan-J without risking heart failure and blindness, I've put off using it for a JR:PLR edition. To hell with it, I'm already going blind and arrhythmic with the Bourne blitz this week, (and [ profile] cluegirl already braved it, too) so, going ahead with it:

Hawkeye by Sheridan-J. I saw this and I screamed "F**K!!" so loud I scared the plants.

April 2017



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